July 29,2009

whoops, I made a mistake. Monday was Karen and Mark's 7 month anniversary. Joe died ten days before that on the 17th of December. Two of my kids caught my mistake. I knew that a week ago. I just got mixed up. Chauk one up for your mind not functioning exactly right. I am in Ohio now for the long weekend. Just took a great nap and now will teach the kids how to play hand and foot. Take care and God bless. Mary Anne

July 28,2009

Hi friends,
Yesterday was seven months since Joe died. I haven't written much lately but I am doing well. I continue to go to the grief group at Wellness House which is very helpful.

I also now have a job with Comfort Keepers and it is keeping me busy but I enjoy it a lot. I have a regular client four mornings a week which gets me up and out of the house.

I just finished a wonderful weekend with most of our kids in town for a few days. Karen came for 5 days and her friends Kelli joined us for the weekend. Michael and his three kids came while Heidi was away with girlfriends. Cassie was here with just Matthew as Kirk and Andrew had gone on a fishing trip. Kev and Tracy were away at church camp but Tracy played golf with us on Thursday before she left. Karen and I played several times and it was great weather. We had some good girl time and some good family time.

Tomorrow I leave to sit for Mike and Heidi again for 5 days while Heidi and her Dad ride in the Pan Mass Challenge in Boston. This is to raise money for Carcinoid Cancer with the Dana Farber Institute. Heidi has this cancer diagnosed a year and a half ago. This year they will ride 80 miles (last year was 50 and Heidi's brother did it with her as well as Michael) This year Michael will be the sherpa.

I have had great success with the gardens in back but terrible problems with algae in the pond. The frogs don't seem to mind but I can't seem to get ahead of it.

I am slowly adjusting to being the only human in the house but I love having the company of Lucky, my faithful dog. Even though he still tries to bully the golf carts, his other behavior is good. I have found scrabble on facebook and enjoy playing with several different people, all of whom are beating me but it is good challenge for my mind.

Thanks for being there and know that I think of you friends often even tho I don't talk as often as I should or want to. Life just gets busy. Any of you who knew Joe and I, know we always had full schedules and that part hasn't changed much. I still miss Joe a lot and think so often of sayings that he used. The other day when I was on the golf course, I thought "now why didn't I let Joe tell me what I was doing wrong ( in golf) while he was here." Yesterday the garbage disposal stopped working. I got out the wrench and turned it and no problem but it wouldn't turn on. When I was telling a friend about it I suddenly thought, "Oh I shouold check the reset button". That was what it was. I am so glad I didn't call a repair man for that!

Enough ramblings. I leave tomorrow morning and have to finish packing.

Take care and God bless all of you.

Mary Anne

Perennials for Dad

Our neighbors here in Hudson, Ohio presented us with a lovely gift certificate to a local garden center upon my dad's death. It was so thoughtful and it inspired us to put in a memorial garden in our front yard with a nice bench and a fringe tree, dwarf magnolia and many perennials all around. Those were things dad really liked. The bed is below a large black walnut tree which Dad always commented about when he visited. He said we should be careful because the wood is so prized that when you are vacation someone could come and cut it down for the value of the lumber. It came out very nice.

May 31, 2009

Hi Friends,
Life goes on and I received two emails from people I didn't know who read this blog that wanted to talk about some things so I guess this is worthwhile.

I have been sitting with this elderly lady three times and it feels really good. It is nice to be doing for someone else and to have someone to eat with and prepare meals for. Do you find that sometimes you just can't find the right words so you don't end the sentence in a preposition? Hope no one is reading this for the literary content.

I have hired our grandson Matthew who is 16 to mulch and weed the perennial gardens and around the house. He has been here twice and it really looks nice. The fish pond is finally getting clearer and I am about ready to buy some cheap goldfish. Right now it is a frog pond but the grandkids love that. They smelled so bad when they came in for dinner on Memorial day we had to have them change clothes to eat. Of course I dont' have anything that fits a 9 and 11 year old so they wore some of my old workout shorts and shirts. Andrew came to the table without changing his shirt and when I asked him why, he said " there were sparkels on the shirt. I picked it because it said Nike but didn't see the "sparkles" How funny.

Now that i am single, Michael, our son in Ohio,is going to put my free time to good use. I will be going there the end of June for a week to sit while they have a little getaway and then again the beginning of August while Heidi does the Pan Mass challenge. That is a bike ride put on to raise funds for the Dana Farber institute for Cancer and Heidi's group will ride for Carcinoid Cancer which she has. She will do 80 miles this year. Last year she did 50 - good for her. Her Dad will be riding with her this year and he is 77. Really good for him!!

I'll bet you are wondering how Lucky is doing with his training. Well, when someone else comes over he knows they are dominant and he does really well, but he is still having trouble accepting me as his leader when the golf carts go by. We have switched collars but the improvement is slow. It is like watching a two years old push the boundaries. But I still love him and he is great company.

That's about it from here. Grief groups are going well. Ons stops for the sumer but the other one will go through the summer. It is great to have people to share with who are experiencing the same thing at about the same timeline.

Take care and God Bless.
Mary Anne

May 13, 2009

Hi Friends,
Since I last wrote I have started both of my golf leagues but got rained out today.

I have spent some time in the garden lately. Cassie shopped with me and bought and planted flowers with me but then I continued for several days after she left. I now appreciate why Joe loved the gardens so much and always liked to look at the flowers after he planted them. I look out every morning to see how they are doing. I particularly like the rose bush Cas and I picked out and it has a wonderful scent. I am feeling much more emotion as spring hits that I think I was either holding back of stuffing with food.

I went to my first grief support group at Wellness House tonight and it was so good to be with people who have gone through the same thing and all with spouses that lost their lives to cancer. I felt free to cry and sympathize with others and felt like I belonged. I even met a friend who was in another support group there with me which was special.

I will start sitting with the elderly lady this Friday. Please pray that Lucky will behave and not bark too much because I will be staying overnight and he has to come with me. I have the trainer coming again tomorrow so I hope she has some good tips for me. My two small groups really see an improvement in his behavior when they are here as he greets them etc. but let a dog walk by the house or a golf cart pass by and he goes berserk. I still love him but I want him to know he doesn't have to protect me from either of these things.

I am still coaching my swim club here at Carillon three times a week and have a few new ladies and some snow birds that have come back so the pool is full. I love helping people learn how to build endurance and enjoy swimming as I do. I will be started a 5 week course of the Bible 101 series doing the New Testament. I love learning more about the word and it keeps me going to it often if not every day. Life is still good and my friends and family are so faithful, I couldn't be more blessed.

Take care and God bless you also.
Mary Anne
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May 6, 2009

Hi Friends,
I have just come back from playing 9 holes of gold with the couples league that Joe and I used to belong to. Now I am playing with Doris, another recent widow who used to play with her husband. It was different being out there without Joe but that first is over now. I am still waiting to get our golf cart fixed. It only goes backwards so that doesn't work very well.

I had Sunday dinner for Cas, Kirk and the kids on Sunday. After dinner they were all out fishing and everyone caught one except Andrew who truly loves to fish. We haven't had a Sunday dinner in a very long time and it was nice. I had Marianne and Cas for dinner on Saturday as they were headed to a concert in Joliet so it was on the way.

By the way if you want to email me my email address has changed. It is now maryanne80@att.net. Joe's is no longer active.

I did attend the grief group here at Carillon last Friday and it was good to be there. There are so many changes just in my vocabulary to get used to.

It is now planting time or almost and the man that used to help us with it from the golf course is no longer going to be doing it so I have asked our grandson Matthew to help me with it. I was never into the flowers but Joe loved them. I loved looking at them but not all the work. I bought some of the flowers this week and there are a lot of perrenials in there now but I have to be careful not to pull them thinking they are weeds. And then there is the pond. Currently it has no fish but I have to get it cleaned up before I can add goldfish. We don't dare add coy because the blue heron love to fish there.

Our family has stayed well this spring and Marianne our oldest granddaughter is finishing her first year of college this week at NIU. She will be working in Colorado at a dude ranch that her other grandparents work at so she will be gone all summer.

The in-town Coburns will be gong to Feed My Starving Children this month to pack food for the poor in Haiti and other countries. We have been going quarterly with our small groups from church and it is a wonderful experience. If you want to know more about it the website is www.feedmystarvingchildren.org . The facility is located in Aurora.

Anyway that is what is going on in my life. I am still coaching swimmers here at Carillon three mornings a week and we have a few newcomers which is always fun. I swim myself about three times a week with my Masters team.

As far as Lucky is concerned he is going to have another visit from the dog whisperer type person next week to work on the barking at the golf carts which are very numerous this time of year. The weather has been beautiful the last few days and you just want to be out in it.

Enjoy spring and enjoy each other. Take care and God Bless.
Mary Anne

April 26, 2009

It has been a busy few weeks with Easter and then my State Masters Swim Meet this past weekend.  - Oh well it is already Saturday of the next weekend but you know what I mean. Anyway, after only three weeks of training for me, our team managed to come in first only 11 points ahead of Evanston so we were surprised and happy.  I did well in my age group getting 8 firsts and one second - however my times were way off last year.  I'm counting this as my off year.

 

The kids are keeping me so busy I have a hard time getting my naps in.  I was able to see Andrew in his dress rehearsal for the talent show  and I will spend Tuesday evenings with Kev, Tracy and her family.  Our Thursday night small group has started up again  and it is good to share with them again after so long away.

 

Lucky is doing well on part of his dog training - the sleeping in his own bed and the feeding schedule but he is terrible at barking at the people with dogs passing by and the golf carts.  He really needs good walks to tire him out.

In my spare time I am playing scrabble on face book with a few different people and it is really fun. I am losing all the games I am playing but it keeps my mind active and I come up with a good word now and then.

 

Emotionally, I am doing OK but feeling the loneliness of not having Joe around more and more.  We used to love to sit on the deck together in the afternoon and just talk and now that the weather is nicer I will miss having him there even more.  I hope to start with a grief group at Wellness House in May.  I went there while Joe was alive in support groups for people with metastatic disease and it was really good.

 

Until I write again,  Take care and God bless.

 

Mary Anne

Easter Weekend

Well howdy! Michael posting here just to say that we had a very nice weekend with everyone in town at "Mom's" house. It definitely takes some getting used to the changes because of Dad being gone. For starters, even though this was not the first trip back since Dad died, the wedding was, it was the first one without a distraction and with 4 months having passed. It hit us hard the void of Dad not being there. You couldn't just imagine that he was in the other room watching the Masters Golf tournament which is where he might have been. He was missing and missed. Mom is doing great and I think we all are moving on with our lives and this new stage. We did take time to spread his ashes and say something about Dad we missed or appreciated. It was great to be together, and I hope and think it makes us appreciate our family even more.

April 9, 2009

Hi Friends,
Well I made the switch. For those of you that are on my email contact list you will get an email telling you but my new email is maryanne80@att.net. This will save me quite a bit of money each month from my previous user so be sure and change it in your contact list. I will still get emails from comcast for 30 days but then it is kaput.

My first night as pack leader was tough. Lucky whined and barked for about two hours on and off wanting to be on the bed with me but I will endure. Just waiting for the first of the out of towners to arrive in about 45 minutes. That would be Michael and Heidi and kids. Karen and Mark get here tomorrow.

Have a lovely Easter. We had a presentation at the clubhouse tonight put on by our church members called. "Is it I Lord" having each of the 12 Apostles give a narrative of how they met Jesus and the impact he had on their lives. It finished with a depiction of them at the Last Supper like the picture and they held that pose for one full minute. It was very moving. It was a great start to this special Holy weekend.

I wish you all a blessed time with family and friends. Take care. Mary Anne

April 8, 2009

Hi Friends,
Obviously I am back home and it is harder being here than in Bonaire but I am quite busy with taxes UGH!, swimming to get ready for the state meet and physical therapy for my shoulder. It is an old injury but I am trying to rehabilitate it to avoid surgery.

Speaking of rehabilitation - are you familiar with Caesar Millan, the Dog Whisperer? Well we actually have a guy right here in Naperville that does the same thing. Hearing about him I thought I would try it because Lucky has gotten so aggressive with other dogs when we go on walks and the golf carts going by has always been a problem.

Well, as I suspected, I have let him become the leader of the pack (not just since Joe died either). So I have strict things I am to do with him to let him know I am the leader. When this man took the leash, Lucky knew who was boss and although he tried his insane barking, he did not get away with it and after just a couple times, we were able to walk by Jayne's Carrie blue terrier without Lucky going nuts. He is no longer allowed to sleep on the bed, he has to eat after I do and I have to pick the food up after 15 minutes. He gets no petting unless he does something for it like sit or lay down. He has to walk at a heel all the time because otherwise he thinks he is the leader and is hunting for me. Oh my, so many things to change. But Sandy was very positive in that he thought Lucky could turn around very quickly. That is if I do. So that is my focus. Of course i have all the kids coming in for Easter tomorrow so that will be interesting to say the least. Michael is bringing his Bichon, Jewel, and at least they get along.

The golf cart issue is going to be more difficult but if i can take command, that should fall into place after the other things.

I love being back in my home church. I sang with the worship team last Sunday and that was great. I'm back in my bible study and our evening small group will start back up after Easter so the calendar is filling up. Evenings at home are quiet but my friends try to keep me busy.

I am switching my Internet service tomorrow so I may have to have a new email address. Be on the watch for the change.
I am trying to decide whether to close this blog now. I will talk it over with the kids but I am doing well and I do have a facebook page if anyone wants to know what I am doing. I may switch to that. I want to print out this blog so I can have it to read but the main purpose was to keep you all informed about Joe and we know he is doing fine. So am I. I couldn't have done it without the Lord and all your prayers but I have a lot of peace. Thanks for being our friends. I hope I can support you in the way you supported me.
Take care and God bless.
Mary Anne

Happy St. Pat's March 17, 2009

Hi friends,
Well I am back from Florida and had a great time visiting with my sister and their husbands. My sister Ron's son Johnny was with us also and it was great to spend some adult time with him also. We played games, did a little shopping, a lot of sitting by the pool, reading and napping. I grew up in a family where my Mom napped every day so I started doing that while I was in college. I managed to keep it up even while working full time by taking my nap around 8 at night watching TV with Joe. I would often miss the last 15 minutes of a show but now with recorders, it isn't important.
I came back from Florida with what I thought was a cold but it cleared so quickly when I got back here I think it was an allergic reaction to the pollen of the trees. I snorkeled the first two days but now I know I can clear my ears so I am going diving tomorrow. We only have a few days left to dive as we leave a week from tomorrow and we have to wash and dry all the gear so we can pack it away. Lucky did great staying with Ed and Jayne while I was gone and it appears (as I suspected) that it is the owner who needs training, not the dog. I will look into that when I get home. He is great except he barks when anyone comes in because he wants to be picked up. When Joe was sick I just did it to keep him quiet and now he expects it.
Today is three months since Joe died. I found out yesterday that Karen and Mark are going to be able to come in for Easter so the whole family will be together again for the first time since the funeral and wedding.

I have tried swimming the last two days and my left shoulder is still giving me problems. I can have one more shot and then have to look at other options. I am disappointed because I love swimming. I will still enter the state meet in April but don't expect to do well, just help the team get some points.

Ed and Jayne are coming for dinner and then we are off to Bible study at the pastor's house.
I have had a good time on Bonaire with no schedule except to dive and see friends and it has been a good hiatus for me. I am adjusting to being without Joe but I know it will take a long time. I so love the emails from all you friends. It keeps me in touch and let's me know what is going on in your lives. I hope to see many of you in IL. very soon and I thank you for warming up the weather there for us.
Love to you all and God bless. Mary Anne

March 5, 2009

Hi Friends,
Well life goes on and this Saturday I leave for Florida to spend a week with my sisters. I am looking forward to that.

I have been doing aboout 6 dives a week, doing a lot of reading and visiting with friends. We had a dive this week where we saw our first green moray of the year and several other species that were unusual. Life is quiet on Bonaire and I like it that way after the year we had.

I have been back to the animal shelter twice and it is fun to watch the puppies grow each week. Several have been adopted already and you can really see the personalities developing already.

That's about it for me. Hope you are all looking forward to spring. Although the economy looks really dismal right now, worrying about it won't help so I try to just live one day at a time and be intentional about my spending.

Take care and God bless.
Mary Anne

What the pictures are about

February 20, 2009
Hi Friends.
My daughter Cassie put these pictures up for me so here is what they are about. Last Sunday T.C. gave me a ride on her motorcycle and we drove to Rincon, a small town that used to be the capital. The children's parade for the Carnival was there . We left before the parade started but had a drink with friends and then rode home. She went nice and slow so I wasn't afraid. That is only the second time I have been on a motorcycle. It's not really my thing but I wasn't afraid and it is a whole different feeling than riding in the car.

Then this week on Thursday T.C. and I went to volunteer at the Animal shelter. They had 10 puppies there as well as about 30-40 other dogs. They need people to play with them and socialize them so they will be more adoptable. I will go again next week and Ed and Jayne are coming with me. The good thing is that no matter how attached we get, we can't bring one home like we could in the states so it is safe.
Our friends from Germany, Roland and Renata, leave for home on Tuesday but other friends from Holland come in the beginning of March.
Today on our dive we saw a goliath fish which is a very large grouper. That was exciting and unusual on Bonaire. We haven't seen on of these for about 5 years.
That is about it for me. I keep in touch with the kids with skype which works really well and only costs me .02 cents a minute.
Bye for now. Take care and God Bless. Mary Anne

February 14th, 2009

Hi Friends,
Happy Valentines Day! I am enjoying the warm weather down here. I have been diving about 15 times and no matter how many dives you have had, you always see somthing new. Not on every dive but occasionally. This week we saw a group of scrawled file fish (about 18) together with a school of blue tangs feasting on an algae garden. You normally see one of two of them together but not a group. There was also a large blue parrot with them and they weren't paying any attention to us. We just hung there and watched for a few minutes.
I have spent most evening with friends. Our friend from Germany, Roland, celebrated his 70th birthday this week and 22 of us went to dinner. That was great fun. I have taught my friend, T.C. hand and foot and Mexican train Dominoes so we can play with Ed and Jayne and Bob and Diane. She is leaving the island for good on the 21st. She is American but has lived here for about 18 years.
Lucky and I walk each morning and evening and he is doing well chasing the lizards but not barking at them. He has adjusted to our routine down here which almost always includes an afternoon nap. The weather is always 80 with warm breezes blowing. We get occasional rain but it doesn't last long.
I belong to a small group down here that Joe started about three years ago and there are now about 12 people in it. It meets on Tuesday nights in the Pastor's backyard. It is a different group of people than I dive with and it is nice to touch base on a spiritual level with people from the island. We also have church on Sunday in English at the International Bible Church of Bonaire. Small church but really nice people.
I have really enjoyed having the internet and skype in my condo this year. I can keep up with family and friends so much easier, I don't feel so distant.
That's about it for now. Have a great day. Tell someone you love them today and God bless you.
Mary Anne

February 5, 2009

Hi Friends,

I made it to Bonaire with no complications.  Lucky was a wonderful traveler and I had one lady who wanted to take him home with her in San Juan.  We were met by Ed and Jayne and staff from Buddy who helped transport the luggage.  Lucky was right at home from the beginning.

I will do my check out dive this afternoon (to make sure I have the right weights etc) and Ed and Jayne will go along.  They are on their 9th dive and loving it.  I have about 10 diving friends down here right now so no lack of people to dive with.  When we leave we put our personal stuff in an owners closet and I am still unpacking that but the condo looks like home now.  Even tho it is smaller than home, it still feels big without Joe.  As I said to the kids, I miss his dynamic presence when he walked into a room.  I have some of his barbershop songs on my MP3 player and I love hearing his voice. I am trying to take each day as it comes and not worry about the future.  I know God knows His plans and that's enough for me.  Take care and God bless.   

Mary Anne

January 30, 2009

Hi Friends,
Well, I made the leap and changed the name of the blog. You will still be able to view the past posts and get to the site the same way but I felt I needed to take this next step. My trip to Phoenix for the AZ. reception for Karen and Mark was wonderful. Although it wasn't warm to them at 65, it felt good to me coming from Chicago. Now I am in the process of trying to gather tax info, which was always Joe's job, and do all the errands necessary to get ready to go to Bonaire again next Tuesday. Lucky will come with me this time and he is spending some time in his traveling bag to get ready. He loves it when he see it come out. We took video of scattering Joe's ashes and it is linked.

I am doing well. I went to a couple grief sessions at Wellness house this past month and will check out other options when I return from Bonaire. But the one thing the facilitator said will stick with me. Where I am is OK and try to live in the moment and not worry about next week or next month. Our daughter Cassie said the same thing. Everywhere I go I run into people who knew Joe. Today I was at the hardware store, one of Joe's favorite places and the checkout girl said, "You are Joe's wife, he was such a great guy". It reminded me that Joe always stopped to talk to the sales people and made them feel special. I miss him a lot but my life is still really busy sorting through things and getting paperwork in order. We had lots of friends who have been very supportive to me and I know we will remain friends.

I will write from Bonaire but probably not as often. Unless of course you want to hear about all the fish I will see diving - boring for those who don't' dive but that is the focus of the day usually. Lucky and I will go for long walks on the beach road and we will both get needed exercise. He gained a half pound (up to 7.5) and I'm not telling how much I gained in the last three months. I am definitely a stress eater.

Enough meanderings - love to all of you and God Bless you in this winter season. Mary Anne

January 20,2009

Hi my dear friends,
It has been along time since I have written on the blog. My kids have been helping out in between and I love the pictures Michael added from the scattering of the ashes. I came home from Bonaire with a chest infection that is clearing up now. In a day or so I will be going to Arizona for Karen and Mark's Arizona wedding reception. I think the reality of the fact that Joe is not coming back is beginning to sink in. It has been a month now, a span of time widows and kids can count each day because it is never forgotten. I miss Joe terribly. I miss being able to tell him the little things that aren't important enough to call someone about but just thoughts to pass along to someone you live with. I missed telling him the things I saw on the dives in Bonaire. I miss rolling over in bed and finding it empty.

I went to my first grief support group at Wellness House today and met someone who attended something that Joe and I attended together in August. It was a good place to start to sort things out.

I will shortly close this website or rename it as it is no longer about Joe and his cancer . It will still be available to read but just won't be as active. Thank you all for being on this journey with us. Your cards and notes have been wonderful and Joe would be happy to know he touched so many lives. Some of you gave cash contributions to the family and I took these to our church in Bonaire who are trying to build a church. Joe was active in helping them while we were down there and actually started a small group down there which is still going strong. The other donations went to Joliet Hospice and our church, Community Christian Church which meets at Carillon where we live.

As I watched our new President get sworn in today, I thought of all the changes that have taken place in our lifetimes. I know all of you, my friends, will have to go through this in some way and I hope to be there to support you as you have supported me. Thanks you and God bless you. Mary Anne

I have been reading e-mails and having phone calls with my Mom and sister Cassie from Bonaire over the past week and it sounds like a great trip. These moments captured here show when friends, Augusto, Wendy and T.C. took Cassie, Kirk and Mom out on a boat to spread Dad's ashes in front of my parents winter home at Buddy Dive in Bonaire. They also spread some at a few of my Dad's favorite dive sites. It doesn't get much better for a final resting place I guess. Dad would have preferred a cloudless blue sky but I am sure the temperature was nice. Reality is I bet he would not have wanted them fussing about him but I know he appreciates the gesture. He was very comfortable talking about these types of things before and after he knew he had cancer. They all took a turn spreading the ashes and then they saved some for a little ceremony back in Plainfield. I guess they are running into some people who had not heard, but for the most part people have kept up through the blog. When I got the e-mail from Mom with these pictures in it, I teared up for the first time in a couple weeks. It felt good. Makes it real that I miss Dad. I also missed him on New Years Eve when I called and woke my mother at 10:30 p.m. central time to wish them Happy New Year and realized I could not ask to talk to Dad. I wished him separately.

Bonaire Bound

I have talked with Cassie and Mom and they arrived safely to Bonaire by Tues/Wed of this week. But not without incident. Kirk got his video camera stolen by the baggage handlers. How frustrating. Hopefully there will be compensation from American Eagle for this issue. Note to travelers, do not separate your self from your camera or video camera or I-Pod during travel at all costs. This was a situation where they had to put their hand luggage into the baggage area since it was a small commuter plane. Dad's ashes traveled along with mom and will reach their final resting place at the bottom of the ocean along Bonaire's incredible coral reefs and diverse aquatic sealife that Dad so enjoyed. His photos will be with us forever. So far it sounds like it is not been so emotional being back in Bonaire without Dad, but those moments surely will come. I watched the Patrick Swayze interview last night and I guess I am so out of touch and certainly don't read the gossip celebrity magazines (rags) that I did not know he had Pancreatic Cancer. While he did not look great, I was so impressed by his relationship with his wife of 33 years and his committment to living life as best he can. His movie "Ghost" seems so appropo and the clips they showed were moving. I wanted to share this blog with he and his wife so that they both can see that what they are inevitabley going to face at some point can be a beautiful and celebratory process and not some terrible death march. I do sense that they are both making the most of their situation.

Happy New Year to all.

January 2, 2009

Hi Friends,
Well Christmas is over, the kids came over and helped me take down the tree and decorations and the house is back in somewhat order. I am going to Bonaire on Tuesday with our oldest daughter Cassdie and her husband Kirk for a week. The first time there will be the hardest but we know there are already dive friends there and lots of island people that are our friends. I have been busy with paperwork sending people death notices etc. and family is calling all the time to see how I am. I don't think it has sunk in yet that Joe is gone forever but the house sure seems empty with just Lucky and me. Trying to adjust to the word widow is even hard. Joe and I loved to play hand and foot and tonight I played with Cas and Kirk and their son and that was fun.

I decided not to write a Christmas letter this year. Everyone who has been reading the blog knows what has been going on in our life so it would be redundant but we had a great year and had many blessings along the way. Although I still catch myself wanting to tell Joe things or ask him where something is, we didn't leave any important things unsaid. Well... unless you call turning the furnace off tonight thinking I was turning off the humidifier!!!. Cas was all wrapped up in the afghan and said "what is the temp in here anyway?" When I checked, it was 69. Just little things like that. Good for a laugh for sure. Love to you all and take care and God bless. Happy New Year. Mary Anne